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Unless you've taken up a crack habit since we last spoke??? hand on your huhhh. i'd like to start off by saying, i met the most handsome man i've ever seen in my life. yeah. that handsome. the kind where the drool escapes your lips and slides down to your chin while your eyes pop out of your head and you make unconscious and unattractive stuttering sounds < x he is amazing. let's backtrack. reverse in time, shall we? three years, xxx month and x days ago i met the man of my dreams. what a fucking scumbag. he treated me horribly. you know, the kind of guy who never pays for anything. never bought you a birthday present. and i'm not shallow, busman wants to meet a black cut nor rich. a fucking card, handmade, would have sent me over the moon with joy. and he knew that. he was the kind of guy who'd lie to your face, go behind your back, get drunk as a fool, come crying home to you - and then destroy your . or ipod. or clothes. or spirit. and i, the x year old naive little schmuck, did nothing about it. i let him. and i loved him anyway. i thought, somehow. there would be this change that would miraculously occur in him. his bipolar would cure. his alcoholism would cease. his anger would melt to happiness. i thought, somehow. taking medication, staying sober, being with me... would make him happy and cure him of these ugly diseases he didn't need weighing him down. what a fucking schmuck i was, right? well. thanks to my being a complete fucking fool, and him being a complete fucking mentally/emotionally abusive cunt - i managed to hurt him just as much in return. i don't really know how i did. i mean, yeah. i lied to the idiot. but he had it coming, right? he'd promise he'd see me. he'd have me wait around. only to disappoint me because he was off on another drunken binge in some fucking corn field with a bunch of hillbilly's and their toothless, scraggly haired slut girlfriends in tow. maybe i wasn't invited because i had all of my straight, pearly white teeth. and my hair is thick and luscious and the color of mocha. and maybe because my face is porcelain doll white and my cheeks are rosie pink and my lips are always somehow stained red. i think that's because i constantly chew my lower lip when i'm thinking. or writing. or drawing. or anthing-ing. regardless. so the lying began. i lied to him. about everything. simple, stupid things. when he ditched me, i'd go out with my girlfriends and dress provocatively and wear nice makeup and let strange men buy my drinks. and then i'd rush to him, scrub off my eyeliner, chew a few pieces of gum and change my shirt. and pretend that everything was fine. when really, all i'd ever wanted, was for him to stop doing this shit to me so i could stop doing it back to him. like i said, this was x years ago and some change. water under the bridge right? wrong. so i stay with this bastard up until about x ish months ago. i know what you're thinking... why? well fuck. if. i. knew. maybe we enjoyed the screaming matches in the middle of the goddamn night. maybe i loved being insulted. maybe he loved getting punched in the face. maybe we loved how we fought because when we would make up, we'd be really nice and loving to each other. but it was always short lived. and those times where it was good, got even shorter and fewer between. i think he loved himself and his addictions and diseases more then he loved me. but we lived together. we were engaged. i know, right? how could an unemployed, alcoholic, mentally fucked kinda guy afford the sweet little diamond right he gave me? he didn't. his nana did. and i, still ever the optimist, ever the hopeful lost cause, ever the "til the end" kind of lover i thought i was... accepted it with open arms. three weeks after our baby was born did he leave. xxx of those spur of the moment fights, when you just don't know what the fuck happened. sure, we tried to work it out. but nothing was the same anymore. the holidays came and went. it was a brutal christmas without him, i must say, because it was our 's first... and i felt as though i had failed as a mother not to have my 's father there. but, looking back, it was meant to be. my spent the time with his loving grandparents, uncle and other close relatives and family friends. it was a spectacular first christmas if i do say so myself, though i missed the man of my dreams. a few weeks ago i saw dream guy in court. gave me sole custody of our . it was in the best interest of my little one, not to have a father who is such an unstable nutjob with a criminal history that is quite extensive and scary. so i just want to say, to the scum bag sperm donor that fathered my .. thank you. if you never treated me so poorly, if you never left me when you did... i wouldnt have had these past x ish months to heal. to grow. to learn lessons. and if you didn't walk out the door and show me what kind of man i really needed all along - i wouldn't have met the most handsome man i've ever seen in my life at blackthorne what a fucking HUNK. you are sexy. much, much, much too sexy for a girl like me. i'm used to dating fat, sloth-like type of guys with bad habits and addictions and mental disorders who are abusive, unemployed and selfish. i'm not used to muscle arms, x -pack stomach, smoke-free, employed, nice car, home owner type of guy. and you like ME? me. meee! for being only x yrs old, you're pretty stable and well established. i'm working on it, at x yrs and raising my little xxx alone - but i'm steadily getting there. living on my own, handling business. but you. are. too. perfect. you're like a dream that could never come true. perfect toothy dimpled smile. perfect green eyes. perfect strong arms you draped over my shoulder or were wrapped quite coolly around my waist. MY waist! all night! you have these pink, full, oh-my-god kind of lips that you pressed against my ear and told me how beautiful you thought i was. and they felt even better sliding against the nape of my neck where you landed a few dozens kisses. and they felt even better melting against my own lips in ajust want a night out panicked, Adult fuck in Key colony beach Florida passionate, frenzy that could have lasted all night long. your short brown hair is just about ing me to run my fingers through it, so i did. your pecs (i've never in real life, seen pecs let alone touch them!) were probably what put me over the edge when i let my hand rest against your masculine chest. probably the tattoos you had under your shirt helped too, especially when you lifted your shirt over your head to show me. probably your calves were so sexy i could have sank my teeth into them. your butt? i couldn't even describe it. nothing can do that ass justice, baby. i had the most amazing time with you last night. even after you dumped about a gallon of cold water on me - and you could see clearly straight through the white t-shirt sticking to my body and my bra and my hardened nipples. i wish i could go back to last night. let you chase me around again with a bottle of water in hand as you wrap your arms around me and stop me in my tracks, throw me on the ground and kiss me deeply. i wish i could go back. i think i love you. so thanks to the ex scumbag, for you have allowed me to meet possibly the greatest man ever. and quite possibly someone i will have a long, and happy future with. i can't wait to see him again :) needing the help of a Slovenia woman Older mwm seeking exclusive sluts personals.  looking for a stud..No men and I prefer a little chubby side:) Hello! 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